A fine, fine Saturday morning.

Saturday Morning:

7am

I wake up. It had just stopped raining, and I was in boxer shorts, heading to the kitchen.

I go on the kitchen balcony to water my dad's plants (my dad's into plants), once again in my boxer shorts. Now, watering plants requires some...bending. So I do my thing for 5 minutes, I turn to face outside because the sun's rays were just coming in, when I see this guy on a balcony from the building across from mine, holding a camera pointed at me. I flipped him off and went inside.

So if someone sees my butt on the internet, I swear I am not mooning you.

That will be a site (*sight, punny!)

Moral: Never go on your balcony half-naked. There's always somebody watching.

8:30am

I go to the club, buy a bottle of water (at 4 times the original price) and I walk up the stairs to the gym. I was installing myself at the treadmill, when a girl I sometimes see at the gym on weekends comes up to me and asks me if she could buy my bottle of water for 5000 LL (10 times the price of a bottled water=$3.33) because she was beat and didn't have the willpower to walk all the way down. In my dashing Hugh Grant charm, I told her to save her money, and she could give me her number instead.

She said: "I'll go downstairs"

Fuck me.

Moral: Never get too cocky with a woman in need.

11am

I decided that a haircut was long overdue.

So I walk to the coiffeur, I argue with the hairdresser because he tried to pass someone off before me while I waited even longer, and I finally got my seat.

Now usually, I daydream while getting my hair cut, because I think it's infinitely boring to wait it off and I didn't have a good view of the tv in the mirror, I didn't want to get out with a torticoli.

So I start thinking about different methods of humiliating my Int'l Law professor (I called the fool's teaching methods "sub-par") while the hairdresser does his thing.

30 minutes later, I come out with a crew cut.

Hey, it was still better than that mohawk he gave me at first.

Moral: Don't tell your hairdresser to "surprise" you.